2013 Spring Issue 2 (April 19, 2013)
It was in Lexington, Massachusetts, that the shot heard ‘round the world was fired. So it should come as no surprise that echoes from the dual blasts in Boston on Monday reverberate here at Carleton.
View all items in News.
Students and professors gathered in Boliou 104 to decide last Wednesday. Five professors from five different disciplines argued for why their discipline should wind up supreme after the apocalypse.
Expecting a catered dinner and discussion about hunger in the United States, students filed into the Great Hall last Wednesday to attend Carleton’s Hunger Banquet, hosted by Residential Life. Most students did not expect to leave hungry.
Having served as the US Ambassador to Afghanistan, Iraq, and then the United Nations, Khalilzad drew upon his experience of serving in the second Bush administration to speak about the dynamic role of American global influence.
With the beginning of the term comes the first announcements of 2013-2014 Fulbright Scholars—with two recently announced from Carleton, and potentially more to come.
“The X has arrived.” So reads one of the dozens of signs now plastering campus, adorned with the a red “X,” and advertising TED’s need for speakers in the coming year.
View all items in Sports.
Carleton College’s Avery Johnson was both outstanding and clutch in her first collegiate javelin victory Saturday at the Norse Relays hosted by Luther (Iowa) College. Johnson pulled out her first-place finish on her final throw to prevail in an exciting back-and-forth competition, recording one of the top throws in school history in the process.
Led by the class of 2013, the Carleton College men’s tennis team posted a 6-3 victory at Grinnell College, in a matchup of regionally-ranked squads. Seniors Alex Chin, Paul Cooper, and Austin Jiang each won in both singles and doubles.
Amelia Campbell ‘16 won the long jump by a wide margin and Avery Johnson ‘15 won the javelin with her final attempt as the Carleton College women’s track and field team took fourth at the Norse Relays with 71 points, only five behind conference foe Hamline University.
The Knights won six events, including three involving sophomore Colby Seyferth ‘15, and the Carleton College men’s track and field team finished second to host Luther College at the Norse Relays. The Knights finished with 127 points compared to 140 for Luther.
The Carleton College softball team gave No. 16 University of St. Thomas all it could handle in the opener, with the Tommies eventually rallying for a 3-2 walkoff victory. The momentum carried over to game two as St. Thomas grabbed the early lead and posted a 9-0 (5 inn.) win to complete the sweep and extend its home-field winning streak to 37 games.
View all items in Viewpoint.
Flatulence, passing gas, breaking wind, ass blast, butt thunder, farting. We all fart, although some of us a lot more than others. And we have all been in situations when we really need to fart, but we happen to be at a funeral, or on a first date.
Does spring actually exist? This question has crossed my mind often lately, because in truth, the recent weather has nearly succeeded in convincing me that the season is a myth. As I write this, I am also looking at a forecast that predicts three to six inches of snow on April 11th.
It’s quite fashionable these days to attack “diversity” as an empty phrase, signifying nothing but the unthinking, bleeding-heart liberalism of an elementary school textbook. It is derided as meaningless newspeak, useful only to directors of HR giving an infinite series of powerpoint presentations. What’s worst is, it’s assumed that the end of “diversity” is just that: a diverse group of faces.
For the second time this year, it is Accepted Students’ Weekend. And for the second time this year, it is snowing on Accepted Students’ Weekend. And not just flurrying--it’s legitimately snowing. Did I mention it’s April?