In Muriella Downs by Gordie Lipton

We’d go to the movies, that’s what it always wound up being. It’s the only place we thought we could go so we wouldn’t be judged by the people of Muriella Downs. Me and Rita, the love of my life, we’d go to the movie theater outside the city limits, past the old hills and the farms, past the barn that once housed countless slaves on the Underground Railroad on their way North. North, it was more than a direction on a map. It was a way of life, North, North of Muriella Downs. Why there was a place like The Plex, the movie theater Rita and I went to, here by Muriella Downs I never knew. My father told me that it was because back fifty years ago the men from the city with fancy suits and dirty cigars came on down and thought this place a good one to start up suburbs of the Big City, so they put up a movie theater to make people want to move out to Muriella Downs.

I came back from one of my movie dates with her, with Rita, the love of my life, around 5:00 in the morning and my father was standing outside on the porch, stirring a pot of oatmeal over a small fire. I wasn’t expecting to see him so early. We stood there facing each other, stone cold.

“Come on in. I’ll cook you some breakfast, son.”

We stared at each other blankly for about a minute, but it seemed quite a bit longer. Eventually I went inside and sat down at the table. I was tired from staying out all night so I rested my head in my hands until I heard my father come in. He went to sit down across from me, putting down the pot of oatmeal and his spoon.

Muriella Downs. Muriella, Muriella Lord, oh Muriella Downs.

I grew up here in Muriella Downs, deep in the Southern Appalachian heart. My Momma died when I was twelve, so it was just me, my father, and my sister Megan. They said that life was better here, life was slower, nicer, you can come out here and raise your kids right, watch the sun set and the cows come home. Real American values like apple pie, strong family ties, going to Church on Sundays, a place where people didn’t lie and no one ever died. There was a saloon in town, where the owner Mr. Murdoch said he made his own whiskey and brewed his own beer. I never really believed him, but was it was part of his character. There was a pool hall, too, the main attraction other than Mr. Murdoch’s place, and a few other stores to go along with it, not to mention a little schoolhouse that went up to 8^th grade. After that, we were given some books to read to continue our education, but most people wound up working on their little farms, myself family included. It wasn’t always so easy with the three of us, working the farm after Momma had passed. I helped, sure, but Megan was too young to work, and my father wasn’t near getting any younger.

“I can make you some eggs, scrambled if you’d like.”

I rubbed my head, trying to keep myself awake. “I don’t want eggs.”

“Well, then what do you want?”

He stirred his oatmeal for a few seconds, but I reckon he was thinking more about me than the pot in front of him.

“It’s that girl, isn’t it?”

“What do you care?”

He stopped in the middle of raising his spoon to his mouth, then lowered it back into the pot. “I’m your father. I do care about you.” We sat in church-silence, him looking at me and me looking down at the table. “What’s her name?”

I figured, my father of all people has the right to know. Maybe.

“Rita.”

He nodded. He picked up his spoon and ate some oatmeal. “I reckon it’s her you want, then.”

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“Oh? Is that really what you think?”

I finally brought myself to look up at him. “I love her, Pop.” He took one more bite of oatmeal, slow, and put his spoon back down. “I love her so bad.”

“What exactly is it about that I’m not supposed to understand?”

“That…I love her, Pop. You couldn’t understand how I feel…”

“You think I don’t understand how you feel?” My father cut me off. He’d never done that before. “What, you think I don’t understand love? Boy, I know more about love than you’ll ever hope to know. I know that I broke my back everyday out there when you were young just so that we could have a good life, so that we could eat a good meal and that you could grow up big and strong.

“I worked my ass off day in and day out so that you could be a strong young man, Aaron. I worked even harder when your sister was born, and when your Momma passed, just so we could try to live a good life. I’ve given everything for you, son, and what have you done? You go off with that…that girl, Rita. I bet you swoon over her like some moonstruck idiot. You have so much, Aaron, so much that God gave you and so much that I’ve worked to give you, and what do you do? You piss it away on some city girl who may or may not really give a damn about you. And you come to me and you tell me that I don’t understand what love is.

My father raised his spoon up to his mouth. I could tell it was shaking. “You’d better think about which one of us doesn’t know what love is and get back to me on it.”

Muriella Downs. Muriella, Muriella Lord, oh Muriella Downs.

Rita was everything I’d dreamed about. Beautiful long hair, deep and fiery eyes that could hypnotize like nobody’s business, not too tall and not too short, not too skinny and not too un-skinny (I’ve learned that you don’t ever refer to a lady as fat unless you want a smack across the lips). Her voice was sweet, low and musical. Her laugh was a special kind of butter that you could never buy at the store. The first time I saw her it was at the pool hall, where my buddies and I were playing for the “Muriella Championship,” is what we called it. It was sorta unofficial, but since there wasn’t a whole lot else to do in Muriella Downs we played it up as much as we could. Winner got fifty bucks and paid-for season’s pass to the hunting-and-fishing grounds. In the past few years, the local fertilizer company had sponsored it. It was what we had, that is until Rita walked into the pool hall.

As soon as she looked at me that first time I forgot all about playing pool. I was too focused on whether or not she was looking at me to pay attention to which ball I had to hit, or whether or not I had to hit it on the table. I’m not sure if I did that on purpose, but I hit the cue ball so hard it knocked 7-Blue clear off the table and I heard someone laugh. I turned and saw Rita, but when I turned she tried to hide the fact that she laughed at me. I guess she didn’t want it to seem like she was making fun, but at that moment I couldn’t have cared if she had led the entire room in laughing at me. By the time the game was over, and I’d lost real bad, I turned to see that she had left. I didn’t want to seem all desperate by asking if anyone knew her, so I figured I’d just say my prayers and maybe Rita’d come back again.

The second time I saw her I took a few pulls of whiskey and asked her if she had a boyfriend. She laughed, and this time didn’t try to cover it. I guess that’s a kinda funny question to ask, but I didn’t want to mess it up so that’s what I said. She said no, she didn’t have a boyfriend and my heart almost burst through my ribs and out onto the dance floor, but I played it cool. Least I think I did. We made plans to go to the movies. It kinda embarrasses me to admit this, but I’d never seen a movie before then. But she asked if we could go out to The Plex, and I didn’t ask questions. Besides, she had a car so I wouldn’t need to get my father all suspicious about borrowing his truck.

My father continued to eat his oatmeal as I stared at him, not really believing if I’d heard what I thought I’d heard. What would have made him think Rita didn’t care about me? How could he have said something like that about someone who’d spent so much time with me, watching movies and talking until all hours and kissing and holding each other and knowing that everything was ok. How could he have said that about this girl, this girl of all people?

I got up out of my chair and walked off down the hallway. I saw that Megan’s room was slightly open, so I pushed it quietly and went inside. I went to sit down by her bed, and she stirred around a bit.

“Daddy?”

Her voice was quiet, still half-asleep. She turned over and saw me, her eyes brightening.

“Aaron! Where have you been? You’re never around anymore, and Daddy never tells me where you go. Where…where do you go all those times?”

I tried to say something, but all I could do was laugh softly to myself. It was hard enough to tell my father, the man who raised me, but could I tell my little sister? “Out, Megs.” No, I couldn’t. “I go out.”

Megan rolled around, innocently, smiling like a little cherub in her polka-dotted pajamas. “Where? Where out?” She sat up and looked at me all curious. “Is it a…girl?”

I laughed. I guess I couldn’t hide everything from her. I smiled and jumped to wrap her up in her sheet all nice and tight. She squealed real happy like as I rolled down next to her.

“Maybe. Maybe it’s none of your business, little lady.”

I let go of the sheet as she snuggled tighter into her bed. “Aaron?”

“Yes, Megs?”

“You’re not gonna leave us, are you?”

Muriella Downs. Muriella, Muriella Lord, oh Muriella Downs.

The first time Rita and I went to the movies I fell asleep. I didn’t really care too much for the kind of movies she wanted to see, but she put her head on my shoulder when we watched them. I hadn’t had a girl at least seem interested in me since Ashley kissed me after our 8^th grade graduation, and especially not one as pretty and smart and nice as Rita. So if all it took to spend time with her was to pretend I wanted to see the “cinema” as she called it, then I’d go see it as much as she wanted. But after a while, I actually became sort of interested in it for real. We’d usually go see movies with action and car chases, which were the ones that I wanted to see. But then I started wanting to see the movies that were more “intellectual,” despite the fact that my own education was limited. Even if I couldn’t get a hold on what the whole thing was all about, movies that actually meant something became far more important to me than ones where all that mattered was beating the bad guy and getting the girl. That last part I seemed to be doing a pretty good job at on my own, really.

The first night Rita and I ever kissed, she told me that when I first asked her out she thought it was just so that I could get in her pants and forget about her, but my parents raised me better than that. Especially Momma, God rest her soul. If Momma would’ve been there and thought that I was trying to be with a girl just to have her, she’d have had me whipped, no questions asked. I told that to Rita and she thought that was funny, too. I didn’t tell her that my Momma was dead, though. Just didn’t seem right. I asked her about her parents, her family. Why did they move to Muriella Downs of all the places in the world? She didn’t answer, she just kinda laughed uneasy. It wasn’t the laugh I was used to coming out of her. She gave me one of those looks, then told me “forget it, it’s a long story.” I told her I had all the time in the world. She smiled at me, and the next thing I knew we had kissed.

It was real quick, I almost thought I’d missed it, but all that crazy feeling rushing through me told me that no, in fact, I hadn’t missed anything. We kept going to the movies after that, it was our date. Once I showed her the old barn that was part of the Railroad, told her about the little history that was here by Muriella Downs, just so she’d understand more the little significance of where I’d grew up. Other than that it was only the movies. I got the feeling that Rita didn’t feel welcomed in Muriella Downs, but I never really asked why. I felt as if it wasn’t any of my business to ask her why.

The thought of leaving had never really crossed my mind. But yet, Megan asking me made me think about it. Would that be what came next? Would me and Rita leave Muriella Downs altogether? Would we go see movies The City from then on? I didn’t know what to say for sure, so I said what came to my mind.

“No, Megs,” was I telling the truth? “I’m not gonna leave you.”

Megan smiled and twirled over in bed, hunkering back down to go back to sleep. I lay there for a minute, thinking hard about Rita, about what was going to happen between us. Would I leave Muriella Downs?

I got up to go back out to the dining room, where I saw my father had nodded off in his seat at the table. I went to move quietly to the door to leave, but something inside stopped me. He woke up, slightly startled but mostly groggy. We looked at each other for a minute, father and son. I thought better of going out the front door and went to sit down at the table. My father got up and went to start preparing some eggs.

Muriella Downs. Muriella, Muriella Lord, oh Muriella Downs.

Rita and I still went to the movies, but after a while she seemed to become real nervous. I didn’t ask why at first, but when something troubles the one you love, you most likely ought to feel the need to find out about it. I asked her what’s wrong, but she didn’t want to say. I kept on asking, but she kept on staying quiet.

The walls came tumbling down a week later. She drove up earlier than usual, so I went out to meet her and saw that she was crying. Her father had told her he’d had enough of Muriella Downs. Enough of the dirty looks, enough of the silent and not-so-silent resentment. He said that it was time for them to move back North, to the city, away from Muriella Downs. She said to me, come with us, Aaron, leave Muriella Downs right then and there, but I remembered my promise to Megan and told her no, I couldn’t just up and leave right then and there. I told her that she could wait out by the old barn, the Freedom Barn, for now. I said I was going to go home and pick up a few things, but really I was going to go think. Could I just leave my family, leave Muriella Downs? I went back home to find that my father wasn’t there. I asked Megan and she said he’d gone out, but that was all he said. I ran up, fast as I could, to find my father before I made my choice to stay or leave. I found him on Main Street, standing next to Phillip and Mark, two men I recognized from Church. He was holding a bag of expensive-looking seed, talking to Phillip and Mark. I ran up to my father to confront him. He turned to me and his expression changed.

“Aaron, what are you doing here? Go home?”

“Why are Rita and her dad leaving, Pop?”

My father didn’t answer. Phillip and Mark stiffened.

“What did you do to them?”

“Now, Aaron,” my father put down the bag he was holding, “I think you know better than to get involved with business that isn’t your own.”

“It is my business, Pop.”

My father started to say something, but stopped. He didn’t want to let out that I’d been seeing Rita so that Phillip and Mark could hear it. But I was sick and tired of all the people judging. I wanted to know why. Why did they chase off her father? Why did they hate him, and Rita? It was all I could wonder. Why? Why?

“Why?” My father couldn’t answer me. “Why?” Mark shifted uncomfortably. Phillip looked around at I don’t know what. “Why, Pop, why?”

My father turned on me, angry. “I had nothing to do with it!” Real angry. “Why you gotta put your face in other people’s business?”

“If you had nothing to do with it, then how is it your business?”

“I…Aaron, son, don’t you ever question me again. I am your father. Despite what you might think, I know what’s right for you. I care about your well-being, yours and your sister’s. And I say that you shouldn’t spend any time with that girl or her family.”

Phillip spoke up first. “You’ve been seeing that girl, Aaron?”

“Yes, sir. I have. And I’ve enjoyed her company a lot.”

“Well, I’d suggest you put a stop to that.”

I didn’t feel it right to speak out against someone who wasn’t in my family, but I couldn’t help but turn a little bit red from that. “Why’s that, sir?”

“She’s bad news, son.”

“Why’s that, sir?”

“They’re city folks. They’re just not right for here.”

“Why’s that, sir?”

“Because they don’t fit in here in Muriella Downs, son. That’s why. They’re not right, they’re not right folks for a place like this.”

“Sir, Mister Phillip, I just don’t see why that is.”

Phillip looked like he didn’t understand. Mark looked like he did, unable to contain himself any longer. “Because they’re un-American!!” I looked at Mark, unable to understand what it was he meant by un-American. “They don’t belong here in Muriella Downs or anywhere else for that matter! Can’t you understand? You get too close to that girl and she’ll corrupt you!!”

My father turned to Mark to calm him, then came to me, placing his weather-beaten hands on my shoulders. “Look at me, son.” Mark and Phillip made their way down the road. I looked after them, the men who proclaimed that Rita was not an American, not good enough for Muriella Downs. “Look at me, Aaron.” I turned to my father, half-unsure and half-angry. “I’m sorry you had to hear that. But there’s nothing you can do. There’s nothing I can do anymore, either. All I know is that you should head on home now, make sure Megan’s doing ok, feed the chickens.” He handed me the bag of seed. “Can you make it?”

I told him I’d be fine, and then I ran straight home. Why’d I go home, why there instead of to the barn and to Rita where I could have been happy and in love? But then I remembered Megan, my little sister that more likely than not meant as much to me as Rita did. Maybe Rita was the girl I loved, but Megan was my family. What would happen if I ran off and left her all alone with my father? Would the stress of doing all the work himself, and my leaving, force him to the grave next to Momma? And then what would happen to my sister? What would become of her with no one to take care of her?

On the way home, I started to wonder. Was my father right? Were Mark and Phillip right, too? Was there something sinister in Rita’s touch, something that would make me forget who I was? Did I love her, really, or was I in love with being in love with her? Was I in love with seeing the movies, too? Or were they wrong, was she someone who’d gotten served the bad end of the meat? Before I knew it, I had made it home. I carried the bag of seed around the house to the chicken coop. I started handing out seed, thinking all the while what I should do. Should I leave, go to The City with Rita, run away to something I knew nothing about with someone who could possibly leave me at any second? Or should I stay here, in Muriella Downs, in a place where there was no future, no bright lights, no movie stars and no Hollywood endings but instead security and family?

I finished feeding the chickens and went back inside. Megan was sitting at the table, waiting for me or father or whoever it was she’d possibly sit and wait for. She was crying. Why was she crying? Before I knew what happened, she ran up to me and hugged me as hard as she could. Maybe she had a sixth sense to know something was not alright in Muriella Downs. Did I have the heart to tell her what was going on? Or did I want to just comfort her and say that it all would be ok? I didn’t know what to say, so I didn’t say anything. We just stood there, her crying and me thinking real hard about what it was I was going to do. I couldn’t leave Rita by the Freedom Barn for too much longer, but when I went to her would I ever come back?

My father came back in without me realizing it. Megan saw him first and ran to hug him too. He sent her to her room to change into some nice clothes. We’d all been invited to a barbecue event and he wanted to make sure we’d all look our best. After Megan ran off to put on her nice dress, my father and I stared at each for what seemed like forever. Maybe he was expecting me to put on my nice clothes, too. Maybe he didn’t know what to say, what he wanted me to do. I didn’t either. He eventually cleared his throat, real gruff. “You coming with us, son?” Muriella Downs, oh Lord Muriella Downs. “We’d all love to have you there. Unless you want to…” My father couldn’t finish. He didn’t want to face what he knew what would come next. Maybe if I told him that I wasn’t sure of it myself he would’ve been able to. The next thing I knew Megan came out, looking mighty pretty in that nice dress of hers. She ran over to my father and hugged him, looking at me as if to ask me too, was I coming? Would I be going with them to the barbecue? I didn’t know, but I hadn’t much time to think about it. I hadn’t very much time at all…

Muriella Downs. Muriella, Muriella Lord, oh Muriella Downs.

Ran off down the road, past the old hills and the farms, going towards the Freedom Barn to see the girl. What would I say when I got there? Yes or no? Past the green grass, the family farms in Muriella Downs, oh Lord, Muriella Downs. No answers in the swaying grass, the tall weeds and ripening cornstalks, growing here in Muriella Downs. Oh, Lord, what would I say? What do I do? My family or the future? No future here, only the past. My past, my family, my heritage here in Muriella Downs, oh Lord, here in Muriella Downs. Going to meet the girl, to make a decision. Would we drive on past the hills, past Freedom Barn to The City, up North, to see as many movies as I had ever wanted to? Or come back here, turn around and come back to my father, to Megan, to the farm here, here in Muriella Downs?

I stopped at Freedom Barn and saw her car parked by the doors. I saw she was asleep in her car, looking peaceful as she could be. What do I say? I had to make a decision, I had to tell her what I was going to do. I tapped on the window and she awoke with a start, rolling down her window.

“Have all your stuff?”

I laughed nervously, not knowing up to the moment what I was going to do. “Yeah.” She reached over to unlock the passenger side door.

“Ready to go?”

I took a deep breath. There was a slight wind against my face.

“No.”

“Ok, well, just hurry back as soon as…”

“I can’t leave.”

She looked surprised. Upset, or only surprised?

“I can’t leave my family, Rita. They need me.”

Rita looked forward. Was she mad at me. I bent down to the window.

“I love you, Rita. I always will. But I can’t go with you. At least, not now.”

She turned to me and smiled a little. We kissed one last time before she turned the key and drove off, past the old barn, past the farms and out of sight.

And I stood there, watching her drive away forever from Muriella Downs.

Muriella, Muriella Lord, oh Muriella Downs.