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Online Remembrance Book

  • From Friend

    September 29, 2006 at 9:41 am

    Ted swam one of the strongest miles I've counted at the Conference meet in the 2002-2003 season. I remember cheering for him as he splashed me at each of his flip turns and screaming with joy as he finished his race. I was unable to swim during that season, but Ted was motivation enough to stay true to myself. He also gave me one of the most heart-felt and genuine hugs at a time when I truly needed someone. Ted knew how to be a real friend, which is something many of us take years to learn. I consider myself blessed to have had Ted by my side, for even the briefest of moments. I will dearly miss his courage, his strength and his enormous heart.

  • From Friend, Elizabeth Shephard

    September 27, 2006 at 12:26 pm

    I was at a party once with Ted last spring, and we were dancing and he was totally letting loose, and was just really really fun to dance with...then we went outside to get some cool air and started talking about Minnesota winters and the hard core people who live in Minnesota and love winters. He said that when you live in Minnesota, you have to live deep like the people who can dance with all their energy and feel the music as much as they can, without caring about what other people think. He said all the colors in Minnesota are deep and that you really have to feel things here. I was amazed at his attitude and inspired by his desire to live so deep--I will always remember that, especially in this upcoming winter and whenever I get myself out on the dance floor. Thank you, Ted.

  • From Friend, Ethan Mooar

    September 27, 2006 at 9:01 am

    Despite both of us being History majors and spending so much time with swimmers, though I myself did not swim, I did not really get to know Ted until our junior year. It was through the radio show that he did with Jens Stevens and my roommate Mark Sielaff that I first met him in more than a passing way. I would often go down to the radio studio to hang out with them during their show, music blaring, Ted rocking out and performing drum solos on the counter. It was often a party atmosphere there, with any number of visitors joining the actual DJs at the station, especially when their show happened to fall on a Friday evening.

    As the year went on I got to know him better, both from his show and from swimmer and history social events. Not that this was a hard thing to do. He was one of the friendliest and most outgoing people I have ever met. He displayed such sheer energy and boundless, infectious enthusiasm for almost everything that it was impossible not to become his friend upon meeting him. On a side note, even that drive was not enough to overcome the discouraging presence of the Northfield Police at a nearby party when we had planned to set off fireworks in the middle of the night this past spring. Sadly we had to cancel the activity.

    The true depth of Ted's generosity, compassion, and friendship can be seen in my experience this past June. The day after Commencement my car died in Indiana, just outside Chicago, on my way home. I spent the next day wandering a strip mall in Merrillville trying to get in touch with anyone I knew in Chicago. Having failed to reach a single person, I called Ted at about 8:00 that night and left a message. I knew he had undergone chemo that day so I had avoided calling him until all other options had been exhausted. Yet, despite undergoing treatment and feeling wiped out, he was one of two people to call me back. The most amazing thing was that he was so concerned with whether I was alright that he continuously dismissed my concerns about bothering him and how he was doing. Though I ended up not needing his help, it remains an incredibly touching exchange
  • Carleton Alum, Carleton Alumni Swimmer

    September 26, 2006 at 2:16 pm

    For some reason (and probably for every reason imaginable), I've been grieving Ted's loss. I graduated from Carleton almost 10 years ago and was a captain of the swim team at Carleton. Now, I am a teacher and a high school swim coach. Although I never met Ted, I know that the swim team is a close community and one in which both hard work and humor is revered; from what I hear, he possessed both of these traits to perfection. I am so deeply sorry for your loss, sad that I didn't get the chance to know Ted, but optimistic that his name and spirit will live on with Carleton Swimming and with all of us who have taken the love and humor we gained at Carleton to spread "the magic" on to others. In his spirit, I hope and know that many people will live a deeper, more meaningful, and happier life. What other legacy could any one of us hope to leave? - Long Distance Swimmer

  • From Friend, Will Dixon

    September 26, 2006 at 2:10 pm

    I've been trying to think of a specific episode or encounter that would best summarize my relationship with Ted, but after some reflection I think that understanding what Ted meant to me is not something any one moment could explain. The one thing that stands out the most about Ted was what a solid, reassuring, dependable presence he was.

    Ted was, to use a slang term, solid. And the importance of this solid-ness should not be undervalued. Carleton is filled with intelligent, impressive, and incredibly busy people. While this environment has a lot of great benefits, it also carries a few unfortunate side effects; people are often too busy to follow through with everything that they commit to. If someone says they'll be at a recital, you often learn to take it with a grain of salt--they might have to put it off for more pressing matters.

    But not so with Ted. Without a doubt, you knew that Ted would be true to his word. He was that rock of dependability in a stream of chaos that was always there to hold on to if things got too crazy. You could count on Ted to be there, you coud count on him to be into whatever it was, you could count on him to listen, to be compassionate and understanding to whatever the problem was, to pay attention even if no one else could spare the time, to care, to be open-minded, to be a friend.

    So that's what I want to say about Ted: you could count on him to be there always. It's not the one time that he was there that stands out, it's that he was there every time. I aspire to be as dependable and solid as Ted was, and everyone could learn from his example. Solid, compassionate, a great friend. He will be missed.

  • From Friend, Scott Vignos

    September 22, 2006 at 10:38 am

    I have this great picture.

    It's sophomore year in Evans 411, a fourth-floor quad I shared with three friends on the Cowling side of Evans. It's the middle of winter term, right around the time when Carleton cabin fever starts to sets in. That night, we were hanging out in our room, a space carved out of the attic of Evans, barely big enough for its residents. But here, there are four guys on the couch, and another four standing behind it. My roommate Micah had this great idea to get out his camera and take a picture of all of us for, you know, posterity's sake. He put the camera on top of the TV, set the timer and flash, now I have this picture.

    It's me and Jens, Ben, Andrew, Dave, Micah, Leon, Lee and Ted. Ted's wearing a Chicago Fire jersey and his signature baseball cap. He's kind of squished against the side of the couch with this huge smile on his face. Everyone has a huge smile on their face.

    I've been looking at this picture a lot lately and thinking about how, if any of us had known what the future held, there would be a thousand more pictures, just like this one, all taken to try to keep close our waning moments with Ted in our midst. Right now, I'm very thankful I have just this one. Ted was that guy who always said hi, and who was always in good spirits, especially when he came back to visit during his treatment. This picture, his huge smile and the huge spirit behind it will stick with me forever.
  • From Friend, Amanda Dowell

    September 22, 2006 at 9:21 am

    One thing that really impressed me about Ted, even long before I knew him well, was his questioning and critical mind. He wasn't the kind of person who could readily accept what he heard or read without annalyzing it and really understanding the issues around it. I remember getting into a somewhat heated debate with Ted sophomore year over whether or not it was morally right to hire a "staff" (guards, drivers,etc.) when living in a poorer country. He was not so sure. I really admired his constant readiness to engage intellectually.

  • From friend, Jens Stevens

    September 21, 2006 at 2:32 pm

    Ted and I did a radio show together for almost three years on KRLX. It started out after I went to visit him in Winnetka in the summer of 2003 and we realized that we both liked the Dropkick Murphys and some other similar punk music. He gave me a bunch of his music, and I gave him a bunch of mine, and the next year we decided that a radio show was clearly in order. It started out as Jens and Ted's Excellent Adventure, and when Ted was away getting treatment Mark Sielaff would fill in, eventually joining the show as a permanent co-host. I always loved when Mark and I would get a phone call from Ted, who would be listening online, with a song request.

    When Ted was in the studio, we would always blast the music (it was not "easy listening" by anyone's standards,) and rock out, with me drumming on the table and Ted playing some mean air guitar and singing along. We always joked that we could form a mean cover band.

    We also loved sharing the studio with other people, with Ethan Mooar, Molly Bergen, Dave Friedlander-Holm and Will Dixon, among others, stopping by to play some of their music and plug events that they were involved with.

    We played what my roomates called "Jens music", but really I always thought of it as Ted Music. Ted's responsible for about half of the music that I have on my computer right now. I've found over the last couple of weeks that there is no better way to remember him than to put my ITunes on random and marvel at how many of the songs I have remind me of him. I remember Ted coming back from his first term off fighting cancer, rejoining the show, and playing all these inspirational songs that he listened to as he had been undergoing chemo and making such incredible progress. They were pretty inspirational to me too. Those songs, like "Give it All" and "Rumors of My Demise," by Rise Against, "Los Angeles is Burning" by Bad Religion, "The Giver" by Hot Water Music and "Mercy Me" by Alkaline Trio, will remind me of Ted for the rest of my life. They are his songs. And I'll always smile when I hear them and think of our weekly air guitar sessions in the basement of Sayles.

  • From Friend, Annie Perkins

    September 21, 2006 at 10:35 am

    I have a couple to share. My favorite is one I've shared with many people already, but means a lot to me.

    I had brought cookies over to Ted for his birthday (his sophomore year), and there was a HUGE thunderstorm outside. I stayed and chatted with Ted and his roommate Nitin for a little while and right before I left, Ted told me to "be careful on your way home. It's crazy out there." I told him I'd be careful just as soon as I'd rolled down Bell hill in the rain; one of my favorite things to do. Ted didn't even hesitate. He got up, said nothing, and ran down the stairs. We rolled down the hill together and he came to dizzily give me a hug at the bottom. Covered in mud and grass, we met Nitin at the top of the hill who just laughed at us. We got to roll down the hill together a few times after that, and it always brought a smile to my face when it would start raining and I saw Ted's name on my cell phone asking to meet over at the hill.

    I received a letter from Ted maybe a year and a half ago, which I think embodies Ted extremely well. He was writing to thank me for my friendship and to express amazement at how quickly he thought it had taken for us to become close. It was touching, and personal. Which is exactly how Ted handled himself. I was never in the closest circle of Ted's friends, but that didn't seem to matter when it came to how Ted treated me. He always gave me the biggest hug after I would jump up and down in excitement when I saw him back on campus. He was poised, fun, and seemed just as comfortable having a few beers as he was having a "serious" conversation about boy/girl problems as he was telling me something new about his struggle with cancer.

    I love Ted a lot, and miss him an incredible amount. I consider myself extremely lucky to have known him and gotten to meet his wonderful family. When some friends of Ted's and I went to see him this summer we had a fantastic day of storytelling and laughing. At one point after some ridiculous story, Ted looked at me, winked and laughed. That's the Ted that I think we'll all remember, and I can only hope to live my life so I can be remembered and loved as greatly and by as many people as he is.

  • Friend and Teammate

    September 20, 2006 at 1:11 pm

    Ted wasn't even a student at Carleton when I first met him. He was a prospective student and from that first little bit of contact I had with him, I knew there was something truly special about him. His drive, heart, intellect, and courage struck me like no other person had ever done before. I don't have one specific memory of my friendship with Ted, but rather have truly cherished my friendship with him. I consider myself very lucky for having befriended such a kind and genuine person. He has motivated us all in life and he will always be remembered.

  • Friend

    September 19, 2006 at 4:50 pm

    Ted was one of the first guys I met at Carleton. I thought he was so cute and such a nice and funny person. I didn't date in high school and meeting him was so refreshing because it made me excited to meet new people. While I didn't hang out with him much by senior year, he was someone who could get an awkward hello out of me - awkward only because I knew that IF we HAD hung out more, we would definitely have been great friends. I will miss seeing Ted's smiling face!

  • From Carleton Swim Coach, Craig Johnson

    September 18, 2006 at 11:47 am

    When Ted returned to the swim team his junior year he met the team at UC Irvine for our December training trip. The first day Ted wanted to do it all. His passion for swimming and training hard had not been phased by his several months of cancer treatment. Ted's mind and heart were ready to tackle it all and swim the 6000 yard workout on the first day. I had a tough negotiation session with Ted for a modified workout, as the rest of the team had been swimming daily for two months. Ted had been getting treatment, but he had not been well enough to swim for quite a while. We were able to come up with a gradual reintroduction to workouts that I think was a healthy and reasonable amount.

    Ted wanted it ALL and he wanted it NOW-- and was willing to work for it. He was and still is an inspiration to his teammates and coaches alike.